Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I wasnt in town to post anything for the 27th and I didnt just want to say happy birthday, or something like that
I recently got the authentic PPX recordings box set!♥ there are very few albums I know of that I dont own
(thats incredible to just say!)
and its absurd to even say "own" haha
I wish for my collection to grow as much as possible I must have so many songs to share,
and I wonder if there are some never heard, and what a sin it is to keep them hidden
I fall in love more and more each day
I dont know what to say really, words escape me;)

"...As for me, I am so glad to salute the brave, reckless gods in another man.

So glad to meet a man who will abide by his very self.

Ideas! Ideals! All this paper between us. What a weariness.

If only people would meet in their very selves,

without wanting to put some idea over one another, or some ideal.

Damn all ideas and all ideals. Damn all the false stress, and the pins.

I am I. Here am I. Where are you ?

Ah, there you are! Now, damn the consequences, we have met.

That's my idea of democracy, if you can call it an idea."


Monday, November 29, 2010

the moral of this story is, UFO means.... u found out!;)

Now I decided I would solve the mystery
about that flying saucer scare
'bout the UFO's people been seing.
And what's goin' on up there?
So I went to the most likely place,
Where I thought they'd come around.
Took a peanut butter sandwich and my binoculars.
And thought I'd have a sit-down.
To wait that is.
Then suddenly I saw it.
Doing about ten thousand miles a curve
Quiet landed right beside me.
And a strange voice said:
"Good evening, sir."
If I knew that you were a man like me,
and you liked rock 'n' roll,
I'd have come to see you, friend,
a long long time ago.

I found an old journal of mine the other day, I started writing in it again, Ive been looking back through it, its nice to revisit old thoughts. Ive been meeting so many poets recently, Ive felt inspired to write, I have so many journals lying around, every time I see a nice journal, I buy it, its a bad habbit of mine i guess, especially since a lot are blank, or only the first few pages written on. Its time I use them;)

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Im sick
hot tea is God sent.
that is all


Almost 1000 light years away, this stardust in Aries spans an estimated distance of 30,000 light years and covers almost two degrees of the sky♥

Wednesday, November 24, 2010


Last night I could not go to sleep so I was browsing through my library and found myself picking up Carolyn Kleefeld's 'Climates of the Mind' once again, and later I wrote some things myself also. well this is one of her poems which is just so incredibly beautiful and exactly where I am in this moment. I want to share it with you all. It is titled "Prelude".

I want to do, be, sleep, hear
without exterior reactions to my being
I want to be an invisible being-
not defined, judged, watched

I do not want to represent anything to anybody
no longer to be inside
the other person's rigid picture frame of me
I want to be-just for the sense of being
To relax again enough to taste, touch, realize life
before it is filtered through me-
through other people's psychic strainers
through their telescopic needs
I want it fresh for me to grasp
before its had so many hands on it first
Just mine to embrace, discover, share
or not share
A privacy, intimacy of me to me-
whatever this may be
to relate directly from where it lies

I breathe a deep breath
at the thought of new discovery-
An intimate first-hand glide with life in my hand
with me connected directly
No filters, no microphones
No need for closed doors; instead-
Open windows Wide skies
No hands on life's clock
Another chance to feel that part of me
that is undiluted
My life to belong to me
to consistently feel its essence


you have to view full screen!

Aurora Borealis timelapse HD - Tromsø 2010 from Tor Even Mathisen on Vimeo.

Have you ever seen an aurora? Auroras are occurring again with increasing frequency. With the Sun being unusually dormant over the past three years, the amount of Sun-induced auroras has also been unusually low. More recently, however, our Sun has become increasingly active and exhibiting a greater abundance of sunspots, flares, and coronal mass ejections. Solar activity like this typically expels charged particles into the Solar System, some of which may trigger Earthly auroras. As this year unfolded, the above timelapse displays of picturesque auroras were captured above Tromsø, Norway. Curtains of auroral light, usually green, flow, shimmer and dance as energetic particles fall toward the Earth and ionize air molecules high up in the Earth's atmosphere. With solar maximum still in the future, there may be opportunities to see spectacular aurora personally over the next three years.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

I know my last post or two might seem contradictory because I am a kind of animal rights activist, but there is a sweet assurance I feel as I post these things that they are beautiful and proof of the contradictory nature of 'The true, the beautiful, the good.'

"If you don't at least occasionally contradict yourself, your position isn't (nearly) complex enough..."
-Terence Mckenna


Suradita Village, West Java, Indonesia (2010). Children playing with their rooster. Actually it was not a real cockfight because the rooster didn't wear blades on their feet. Children likes to play this game because they almost never have toys in their life.
Photo and caption by Ario Wibisono

San Bushman

A San Bushman shows his hunting technique
Photo and caption by Michael Phipps

Indonesia, Java, Volcano Ijen: sulfur miner chocked by toxic fumes

These Indonesian miners,in primitive conditions not seen in most places for more than a century,often wear no protection,carrying up to 100 kilos of sulfur on their shoulders,climbing steep rocky paths and descending the volcano for 3 kilometers,bare foot,twice daily,choking from stinking,toxic fumes.For this shortened, blinding, gagging life in hell,they are paid 6 Euros a day. These conditions destroy their lungs, eyes and other tissues.“We work in hell,” said the miners,“our eyes and lungs burn the whole day, but there’s nothing we can do. Otherwise, we’re scared we’ll have nothing to eat.”
Photo and caption by pierpaolo mittica

Eyes Of Time

I had the opportunity to walk the streets of Kayamandi, one of the most interesting, eye opening, experiences of my life. To see people live in conditions I did not realize could exist.
Photo and caption by Joshua Smith

Cambodian Boys and Snakes

I was getting an intimate perspective of the Tonle Sap in Cambodia from a local teenager, when these two boys with snakes swam up behind looking to engage us. This was a day in the life of a child living on a river settlement. This was also one of those moments that can not be conveyed with words.
Photo and caption by Thomas Szelazek

The Fisherman Dance in The Morning

look for fish in the morning is a habit of fisherman in the Rawa Pening, Central Java, Indonesia. One of the fishermen in this picture called Sugeng. He has a characteristic in catching fish using nets. While he was fishing he looked like he was dancing.
Photo and caption by thommy auguzth

The earth needs a beautiful and rich nature

This is Daria, 28. She is mother of two children and pregnant with a third. She lives with her family on a landfill in Cebu City. They have an average income of 2 USD a day, earned by collecting the recyclable fractions out of the city garbage. I like this shot because Daria found herself a T-shirt saying "The world needs a beautiful and rich nature". What an irony, considering the environment she and her family have to live in.
Photo and caption by Tanja Schalling

Into the hands of faith

The believer pierced at a Thaipusam festival in Singapore's Sri Sririnava Perumal Temple points at a woman who lets out a shrill scream before falling into a trance-like submission. She is supported by fellow devotees who hold her up while Saffon powder is rubbed on her forehead as a form of blessing.
Photo and caption by Phua Li Ling
The following photographs are some of my favorites from this years
in the 'People' category.

The ocean glowed bright peacock green Sunday off of Namibia.

Ocean waters glowed bright peacock green off the northern Namibian coast in late November 2010. The Moderate Resolution Imaging Spectroradiometer (MODIS) on NASA’s Terra satellite captured this natural-color image on November 21, 2010.

These bright swirls of green occur along a continental shelf bustling with biological activity. Phytoplankton blooms often occur along coastlines where nutrient-rich waters well up from ocean depths. The light color of this ocean water suggests the calcite plating of coccolithophores.

Phytoplankton blooms and the bacteria that break them down can create a complex network along a continental shelf. This swirl of peacock green could contain phytoplankton, sulfur, or a combination.
♥♥♥Flowers for me♥♥♥

Sunday, November 21, 2010

There are places I remember....

This is the lake I used to visit (from my last post)
The ducks used to come right beside me and take their morning naps while I read.


I just watched the film 'How The Beatles rocked the Kremlin' it was really really good. Tomorrow is my birthday and I have decided to do nothing! haha well to not celebrate it how some people would like me to, I plan on just spending time with myself and to reflect on my 20 years on this earth!, it is much needed. definitely. Things have (mentally) been kind of shakey lately and I really just need to go sit by a lake and relax like I used to, I remember on windy days the tiny waves would rush my way and its the most amazing feeling to have the water want to reach and hug you while the wind caresses your skin, I need more moments like that, I mean they are all around me, all the time, but I need to appreciate them a bit more than I have lately. Its a sad thing, after spending some time in one of the most beautiful places on earth, to come home and slowly accept, or get used to living indoors. It happens. I just need to see every space that I am in with the same amazement, and to see it holds the same beauty as anything else. This by the way is NGC 6357 and its beautiful massive stars.
Happy Birthday to me

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Stephan's Quintet

About 300 million light-years away, only four galaxies of the group are actually locked in a cosmic dance of repeated close encounters.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

‎"Powerful Women are able to draw on both the feminine and masculine dimensions of shamanism in their minds and flesh, truly exemplifying the woman

in the Shaman's Body."

- Barbara Tedlock, PhD in "A Woman in a Shaman's Body"

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Winter's so cold this year
You are so warm
My wintertime love to be

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The Basic Trusts and Beliefs. You must be ready to accept the
possibility that there is a limitless range of awareness for which we
now have no words; that awareness can expand beyond range of your ego,
your self, your familiar identity, beyond everything you have learned,
beyond your notions of space and time, beyond the differences which
usually separate people from each other and from the world around

You must remember that throughout human history, millions have made
this voyage. A few (whom we call mystics, saints or buddhas) have made
this experience endure and have communicated it to their fellow men.
You must remember, too, that the experience is safe (at the very
worst, you will end up the same person who entered the experience),
and that all of the dangers which you have feared are unnecessary
productions of your mind. Whether you experience heaven or hell,
remember that it is your mind which creates them. Avoid grasping the
one or fleeing the other. Avoid imposing the ego game on the

You must try to maintain faith and trust in the potentiality of your
own brain and the billion-year-old life process. With you ego left
behind you, the brain can't go wrong.

Try to keep the memory of a trusted friend or a respected person whose
name can serve as a guide and protection.

Trust your divinity, trust your brain, trust your companions.

Whenever in doubt, turn off your mind, relax, float downstream.

-'The Psychedelic Experience'
A manual based on the Tibetan Book of the Dead By Timothy Leary, Ph.D.

A beautiful view of an ugly truth

Bolivian Deforestation

Once a vast carpet of healthy vegetation, the Amazon rain forest is changing rapidly. This image of Bolivia shows dramatic deforestation in the Amazon Basin. Loggers have cut long paths into the forest, while ranchers have cleared large blocks for their herds. Fanning out from these clear-cut areas are settlements built in radial arrangements of fields and farms. Healthy vegetation appears bright red in this image.


scenes developed for their aesthetic beauty, rather than for scientific value.
Ive been meaning to share this, I wrote it down some time ago while listening to coast to coast but I didnt write the author.I hate when I do that, I write things down hoping to look further into them the next day and always forget, so things are left half complete. well anyway here it is:

"..what feeds prophecy is a people who bring souls through birth and train them with the egoism that allows them to repeat the past and call it the future.."

Isnt that just THE TRUTH!
also, last night I was also listening because George had 'open lines' I love open lines and this woman came on and told her story of a friend who committed suicide while in Iraq. When she returned this was always on her mind, and stayed with her. She then talks about going to see a psychic, and having a very profound experience: the psychic tells her everything, on point! She even knows of her friend from Iraq, so the woman asks what is now of him, or how is he and the psychic gives the most beautiful response:

"..People who commit suicide go to a place thats like a hospital [for souls] and help out souls.."

George then ends the night by saying, you know what I think so because I doubt people who commit suicide burn in hell.
word to that!


This is what my bed looks like right now, I have been really just reading a lot, as lame as that sounds :3
anyway, I recently got SO MANY things, books, articles, essays, writings on a wide variety of awesome subjects so I have enough to keep me busy for a good while, today I plan on reading Tim Leary's version, if you will, of the Tibetan Book of The Dead. should be great, also I am currently reading Aldous Huxley's 'The art of seeing' I finally got it!! :D along with some ethnobotany/pharmacology papers (of course) and as of right now I am reading a short work from Aristotle, 'On sleep and sleeplessness.' busy busy busy, but I love it!
Oh! and I got a new highlighter, such a simple thing brightened my day;)

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Multiverses: Do Other Universes Exist?

Do nearly exact copies of you exist in other universes? If one or more of the multiverse hypotheses is correct, then quite possibly they do. In the above computer-enhanced illustration, independent universes are shown as independent circles or spheres. Spheres may be causally disconnected from all other spheres, meaning no communications can pass between them. Some spheres may contain different realizations of our universe, while others may have different physical laws. An entire set of parallel universes is called a multiverse. The human eye might represent the possibility that realizations of some multiverse hypotheses might only exist in the human mind. One criticism of multiverse hypotheses is that they are frequently difficult to test. Some multiverse hypotheses may therefore be great fun to think about but not practically falsifiable and therefore have no predictive scientific value.
-Robert Nemiroff (MTU) & Jerry Bonnell (UMCP) NASA
Its always nice to see what mainstream science thinks on subjects one might already accept as truth;)

And Im leaning out my window sill diggin everything...

Rainy day, rain all day
Rain is a prayer answered, water is a luxury, so after a rainy day in town the next is for sure going to involve lots of washing! and nice showers;)

my lover Jonathan Ott

I have so many notes on Jonathan Ott, and I realized I have not shared any on here, only a picture of him in my earlier posts, and a lot of people I come across dont know who he is, you have to know who Jonathan Ott is, he is one of my biggest inspirations.
...the time has come where we have to call the
officials on the carpet, and take the debate to them, and make
them justify their policy, stand up and debate it scientifically.
“How can you justify this expense, this waste of public funds,
criminalizing large elements of the population, exacerbating
the AIDS epidemic, the hepatitis epidemic?” and make
them explain why they’re doing this. They’re the ones that are
screwing up, not us. We’re just doing civil disobedience, our
sacred democratic duty when a government is miscreant,
because we can see really clearly that they have a very evil,
unethical, unecological, uneconomic, racist, flawed and failing
policy. And it’s high time for someone to say, “The
emperor’s got no clothes, and let’s arrest him for indecently
exposing himself, under the existing laws.”...
-Jonathan Ott
Interview with 'The Entheogen Review'

Saturday, November 13, 2010


♥35 million light-years away. About 100 thousand light-years across♥
Gravitational interactions with its neighboring galaxies have likely influenced the shape of spiral galaxy M66.

Friday, November 12, 2010

People run all over the place looking for paranormal abilities,
but notice that when I speak if your internal dictionary matches my internal dictionary that my thoughts cross through the air as an acoustical pressure wave and are reconstructed inside your cerebral cortex as your thought, your understanding of my words.
Telepathy exists.
It’s just that the carrier wave is small mouth noises.
-Terence McKenna
Eros and the Eschaton
Midnight reading
I like to brush up on my mathematics every now and then;)
[to my mind] when you're hallucinating, you have an absolutely clear proof that you are not generating this material. Its not funny ideas, its not racing thoughts, its not insight into what your boyfriend really meant yesterday. That kind of thing we can all generate by just inspecting our own minds. But a hallucination is to be in the presence of that which could previously not be imagined. And if it could previously not be imagined, then there is no grounds for believing that you generated it out of yourself.

I mean, we should each know our own inventory. You know what's in your cupboard, you know what's in your chest of drawers, for God's sake, you ought to know what's in your mind. Then if something comes forward, and you say, "That's not mine, That's not in my inventory," then you have a kind of perfect proof that this is coming from somewhere else. Then the question becomes, where? And we can set off into that, opinions differ and nobody has God's truth on it.
-Terence McKenna
Eros and the Eschaton

Thursday, November 11, 2010

If I worked out as much as I read, id be FABULOUS!
I will start.........again ;)

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I plan on painting for the rest of today
I hate having to use the microwave!
that is all

Monday, November 8, 2010

This is the beautiful view from my grandmothers rooftop, this was the home I stayed in on my second trip this year. Heavenly.♥♥♥
just too perfect.!♥

[Hand-Build an Earth Sheltered House For $5,000]

Love is a Cosmic Force

Love is a Cosmic Force, Alex Grey 2009
whats it like to be a character in a dream?
......cause I am not awake right now;)

♥Alex and Terence♥

For Terence
Peculiar and proud.
“Say it!” said the mushrooms
Say it loud and true
Don’t withhold the torrent of words
Don’t withhold a shred of truth—
If it’s good and beautiful
or even ugly and grotesque
Don’t withhold the iridescently infinitized arabesque
or the humorously frightening alien burlesque
McKenna McKenna McKenical DMT elves
With pointy ears and electric shears
To cut your ego’s grip.
Torrents of terror
when the fabric is rent
A tear rents
The media’s mechanical trance
And words flow like lava
with pyroclastic psychedelocution.
Words point like fingers
waving like old friends
From the future.
Pointing—over there!
Right inside you!
To Logos, the Cosmic Loom
Weaving a paisley DNA Milky Way fabric
To re-weave the fabric the
Terror has torn.
He won’t withhold a shred of love
Because it re-weaves the fabric
In every dimension. Ultimately. Simply.
Fractally. Creatively.
His Art is to form the instrument of
his mouth in such a shape
That echoes of awakenings outside of time
Arrive and take residence in our hearts
Never to leave us
But to encourage our own weird way—
Buy an artist’s work, you feed them for a day
Inspire an artist’s creativity
It’s the soul’s lifetime feast.
Thanks for the banquet!
With love,

Sunday, November 7, 2010

A day will dawn when you will laugh at all your efforts. What is there to realize? The real is always as it is.

There is no greater mystery than this, that we keep
seeking reality though in fact we are reality. We
think that there is something hiding reality and that
this must be destroyed before reality is gained.
How ridiculous! A day will dawn when you will laugh
at all your past efforts. That which will be the day
you laugh is also here and now.
-Sri Ramana Maharshi
shared with me by a new friend.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

what's your favorite thing about the universe?

thats just such a good question! I have never been asked this, and its tricky to answer because the universe is so vast. hmmmmm.. maybe that it puts me in my place? ;)

[Where's your will to be weird?]

The Elephant's Trunk in IC 1396

Of course, the cosmic elephant's trunk is over 20 light-years long.
Nearly 3,000 light-years distant, the relatively faint IC 1396 complex covers a large region on the sky, spanning over 5 degrees. This dramatic close-up covers a 2 degree wide field, about the size of 4 Full Moons.

Friday, November 5, 2010


only thing Ive ever done small enough to scan, did this some time ago,
was going to finish/add more things, but haven't so far;)
I was looking through a marine aquarium book of mine and was inspired by all the beautiful cnidarians. I hope you dig;)

In probing the Other we shall always come back with images of ourselves. In probing ourselves we shall return with images of the Other.

This is how magic is done: by hurling yourself into the abyss and discovering it's a feather bed.
-Terence McKenna

I realized that I haven't painted in such a long time because I chose my sanity or peace of mind over creating.
When I paint something, I feel so exhausted afterwards, and I act really weird, sometimes I am not even me, and I see crazy things, and have the weirdest thoughts. Since my trips to mexico I have really been so calm, and I have slept every night since, I really enjoyed it, I have had no worries at all I have just been living a nice calm life. Dont get me wrong, painting is also a peaceful thing, but in a most bizarre way.
Last night I came to this conclusion, and thought what am I here for if not to paint, I see color in everything, when I listen to music I paint a picture in space, and everywhere I go I study nature to see what is done so effortlessly that I have to work so hard to achieve, and I thought I need to FACE my self.
Its a process of insanity and sleepless weeks, months at a time, weird visions, countless 'coincidences' and then the peaceful bit where its total seclusion of the mind, from everything that is not in harmony with your now. Thats the part that makes it worth it, to me, not so much the finished product because instantly comes this feeling of surfacing which is rather uncomfortable, and may be why I never seem to finish much;)
And so this cycle started last night.